I once had an intense meditation experience in which I saw what I later discovered was my fear. It was this horribly ugly, misshapen, gray blob. It was like a weird Cartoon Network creature. It had one eye, some random whiskers and a couple of teeth. Really weird. I could tell it had been lodged deep inside for a long time. So, I went to see a pranic healer, who helped me understand what I’d encountered and helped to remove that fear scar or ‘samskara‘ that I’d lived with for so long — so I could begin to heal.
When we ‘removed’ the fear blob, it left a very distinct hole. I’d lived with fear for so long, it had left an impression that was not so quick to leave, but the healing began. I noticed subtle changes in my response to situation in which I would normally have had extreme bouts of anxiety. I teetered (and still do) back and forth between my old fear-based behavior patterns and faith with acceptance and growth.
Recently, I had another encounter with my fear during meditation. This time, the Cartoon Network ‘blob’ was walking beside me, trying to pull me along as if to guide where I was going. This time he was smiling; non-threatening. I could tell all my fear blog wanted to do was help protect me, and for that I’m thankful. What I realized during this encounter that I didn’t realize last time, was that my fear is separate from me. It might be an accessory in my weird life, but it’s definitely a separate entity that I can choose to acknowledge and move on.
I felt badly for the fear blob, and his determination to protect against anything bad that might NOT ever happen. A year ago, I would get sucked into the debilitating ‘what if’ scenarios and completely lose consciousness. Now, instead of being dragged around by my fear wherever he intended to take me, I graciously broke free of his grasp and walked beside him.
Acknowledge your fear, for it will always be around, but choose to walk beside it. Decide today, not to let your fear lead you.
- Your Charmed Yogi
P.S. This meditation was NOT brought to you by mind-altering substances.
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